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Kerrie shares her memories of her son at FFL since 2014.

Harry, who has Autism, is non-verbal and has recently been diagnosed with epilepsy, joined FFL at a time when he was very socially isolated and would not go anywhere without his parents. We looked back on his time with FFL with him and his mum during lockdown. 

Harry joined us in July 2014. Can you remember what Harry’s social life was like and how it may have changed because of various factors?

Kerrie: Oh yeah, it’s changed massively. So, what we talking? 6 years ago so he would have been 6 or 7 back then. Yeah, he’s come on massively since then.

Did you socialise much, apart from with family?

No it was really hard work taking him out when he was that age. If we went to a play barn or anywhere like that, he’d just scream because it was too loud but then we got to find out about these groups that are a little bit different to your average kind of setting so yeah they’ve helped massively.

Do you think that your views and Harry’s views, likes and dislikes are listened to and taken into account?

Oh yeah 100%. When I think back to the bowling in Crewe and he used to really enjoy that. You know, there’s been times when I’ve said “I’m not gonna leave him, I don’t feel confident” and you’re like “yeah, yeah that’s fine” but then you give me ideas like “well, we understand you don’t want to leave him but why don’t you go and sit in the car for an hour or go to the shops” and we were just sort of building on that before lockdown happened. Then my brother started bringing him for a few sessions just so he had an hour or so really. He’s about 5 ft 6 now and he’s getting bigger so yeah its just that little break.

I remember the first time, I think we went to Hobby Craft in Crewe, and were doing an activity in the room upstairs and you went downstairs to pick up some bits from the store and were worried saying “just ring me straight away if he needs me or starts screaming” and he was fine.

Kerrie: [laughs] yeah! I know.

What do you think he gets the most out of accessing Friends for Leisure?

It’s just that bit of socialising isn’t it and something to do. Somewhere to go where everybody…like, you know if he rolls around on the floor, nobody in that room is going to perhaps blink an eye! But if we go anywhere else and he starts rolling around on the floor, everyone thinks ‘god, what’s up with him?’ so it’s the understanding I think as well.

Do you think he feels safe at Friends for Leisure?

Yeah, definitely. And I feel 100% that he’ll be safe.

Have you got a favourite memory of Harry at FFL?

I’d say it was the bowling. It was such a shame that that ended [the bowling venue closed down] because he used to REALLY enjoy it. He’s quite clever at memorising roads and he knows where all the takeaways are! So, he used to know that time on a Saturday and he’d get quite excited. Yeah he really really enjoyed that one so I’d say that’s where he benefited the most-that’s a good memory.

 Has trying new things and places with FFL helped Harry to try other things?

Erm, not so much the bowling because we would go bowling anyway. The activity at Crewe Juniors with the animals-the dogs-that’s something he’s not tried before but also he’s come on as in…we call you [FFL] ‘club’ and he just knows what that is. He could say that himself, you know, so in the morning if we said to him “right, the bus is coming, its school, home, tea and then club”, he knew what that meant so that’s good that that’s come on. Not so much the activity but his understanding.

Has he built any friendships or connections with others at FFL?

He’s got quite a good relationship with Tess [activity leader who also works at Harry’s school]. He recognises people but he’s not at a stage to build up a friendship.

Has FFL supported you in any other ways?

Yeah 100%. Definitely through lockdown, there’s been various little things going on that have helped-the quizzes, stuff like this, everything online. Yeah.

And what about supporting you as a parent carer?

Yeah, I remember when my dad passed away and I went through that really bad time and you spoke to me about anxiety support and different coping mechanisms so yeah.

Harry had an FFL 1-to-1 for a short while didn’t he?

Yeah, he’s also got a PA and goes out with my brother. I didn’t feel confident him going out with a stranger, especially now he’s recently been diagnosed with epilepsy. He was having a fit every other day and then we went into lockdown but now I think we’re ok in that area because, like I say, my brother has been doing PA work with him so that’s working out really well. Yeah, you’re going to Steven’s tomorrow, aren’t you?

Harry: yes!

Yeah, he goes and walks his dog.

He’s come a long way with animals if you look back to when Crewe Juniors visited Pets at Home and he wouldn’t go anywhere near the animals that were presented to him and now he’s walking a dog!

What do you think Friends for Leisure does well?

I think, like I say, all the groups are run well but you’re always asking for different ideas like Frankie said on Zoom last week “is there anything you want to do?”. I just think it’s a really good group that supports families.